Housekeeping: Kerri Thompson has opened up the June meal calendar for the Lopez family. Here is the necessary information: www.carecalendar.org
Calendar ID: 15804
Security Code: 9927
A quick Ava update: She continues to make small gains everyday and continues to gain slightly greater muscle control than days before. Most notably she is having more neck muscle control as is evidenced by how often she thrashes her head from side-to-side while lying down. As of yet she still does not have enough neck strength to hold her head upright, but this will come and we’ll be here to let you know when that happens.
Now, a much deserved, “thank you…”
A recurrent theme during this chronicle has been the heartache that a parent feels for their hurting child and at what lengths they would go to relieve them of that suffering. How easy it is to rationalize our own pain, but not the pain of our children. How easy it is to set aside your own interests for those of your children. How painful it is when you are unable to do it. How you ache internally with the realization that you must let them go, to travel their course alone.
There has been one person that has been hardly mentioned during the accounts that I have put on Caringbridge, that deserves special recognition for her efforts. She has been with Manny, Traci, Jack, Isa, and Ava every minute of every day since arriving in San Antonio in the early hours of 24Apr09… Manny’s mom, Beatrice.
Think of how difficult it would be in your own life if, without any advance warning, someone were to call you right now and say, “You need to be at the airport in one hour and you will be gone for the next month.” I know that in our own house it takes three days of preparation for a two day trip. Beatrice put her own life and work on hold in the few seconds that it took for her to be told of the trajedy that took place in her son’s family’s life. And I am certain that there was absolutely no hesitation in doing so.
Beatrice has been an unsung hero through much of this, burdening her own pain in silence. Many people who do not even know the Lopez family have been brought to tears by Ava’s story, and it is so easy for this to happen if all you do is think about a child that you love very dearly. Now imagine the pain if it really were that child. This is how it must be for her, yet she is often overlooked because her pain is “minimized” by the pain of Ava’s parents.
Beatrice has been there to help in whatever capacity she can… feeding, baths, bedtime routines, overnight stays in the hospital,… whatever… wherever… whenever.
There have been many contributors from both the Lopez and Southerington families, but tomorrow Beatrice returns to Los Angeles and leaving her son and his family. Tomorrow will likely bring a similar pain that she felt when first learning of this tragedy… an emptiness.
For those who are here in San Antonio please acknowledge her and let her know how much you care and appreciate her… and for those who will receive her again in Los Angeles… please acknowledge her and let her know how much you care and appreciate her. She deserves it more than any of the rest of us who are trying to lend support to this most deserving family.
Ava, the party waits for you.